Monday, December 8, 2008

The Next Day...

Having a "new reality" such as breast cancer get introduced into your life is something that takes a long time to set in. It is a nightmare that you cannot you wake from. In addition to that is a sense of dread in not knowing what exactly you are up against. The following day was spent learning as much as we could about breast cancer and informing relatives and friends of the news.

That night, 10/28, was spent with Tracy's mom, dad, sister, brother in law and my parents. Delivering the news was not fun, and there was a lot of tears. But mostly, we just really appreciated having company. The company of family. It was a great comfort. I cannot imagine Tracy and I having to face this alone. And I do not want to even think about anyone facing breast cancer alone-- without family or friends to support you.

Tracy and I spent the next day together at home. It was a dark and a sad day. Cancer was constantly on our minds. At one point in the afternoon, we watched a tape of the Biggest Loser, which is a show Tracy & I have always enjoyed together. It did take our minds off of things a bit. But there was a time during the show when Tracy just turned to me and started crying. She was said that for a brief moment she had not thought about the cancer. But then, it came back into her thoughts and she thought to herself, "Wow, I actually didn't think about it for a few seconds." This is what cancer does. It takes over. And it changes everything.

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